Petitions to have Tamer Hagras 2ukhtubni
.1. As I was waiting in line this morning at Tim Horton’s, I was forced to watch the woman in front of me attempt to order an x-large by motioning and asking:
“Can I have that really big cup of coffee of yours?”
:: insert hand motion to denote wide, rather than large object ::
“The really, really huge cup of coffee?”
The woman behind the counter looked discombobulated and so I offered: “Do you mean the extra large?”
To which the crazy woman hollered “YES!”
Note to you: Imagine her on a game show.
Perhaps she was merely having an off day. I did that once at the A & W counter when I requested “portable ketchup”. Am certain everyone around me thought I a loon.
Note to self: Imagine am on a game show. One that is televised in Cairo and is Tamer Hagras’ favourite game show. Perhaps Tic Tac Cairo, or Cairo Squares, Wheel of Cairo, Cairody, or even The Cairo is Right.
Note to self 2: Have found 14th calling; Go to Cairo, start game show and make millions of dollars. Marry Tamer Hagras.
Note to self 3: Oh. My god. What if Tamer Hagras is already married? (More on this later, maybe. Must do investigative work first.)
.2. I have the first signatory of the "Tamer Hagras Should 2ukhtub (me)" petition which I alone am spearheading: Sami Al-Husseini.
In one of his comments, Sami wrote: "Please Tammer come to Ottawa and propose!!!!"
We shall forgive Sami’s misspelling of Tamer’s name, and am certain Tamer and Sami will like one another once they meet at the wedding.
Also, and although a variation of “2ukhtub”, “propose” functions in the same capacity and one that is binding nonetheless.
.3. Do friendships have expiration dates? What of acquaintanceships? Is there a time limit one can impose on those in front of them before they can chuck them? Deny them? Ignore them? And what of respect and courtesy and being adult and all things nice that we were raised to revere?
.4. Still have not purchased either props nor food for Saturday evening, am running out of time and am seriously lacking any proper hostess-ing skills at the mo.
.5. Spoke with R once again this morning and he was happier than last we spoke. He was on his way to visit Ahmad in Vermont and get him out of jail (they were able to pool together the bail money), where our girls and boys in the immigration offices thought it appropriate to place a terrified refugee seeking shelter.
It made me smile to hear a slight relief in his voice, although Ahmad will still be deported back to the 56 year old refugee camp in Lebanon. Allah yi7meehum and inshallah all of this work being done by the likes of R will pay off if not today, then in the future. Their work is both inspiring and inspired.
.6. As of this morning, I received the mailing addresses of 7 individuals whom I don’t know and who want Holiday greeting cards due to what I blogged a few days back.
.7. I have discovered that boys lie. Men don’t, but boys will always lie. I on the other hand, am an absolutely terrible liar as I become completely anxious, jumbled and convinced that Allah will crush me by unravelling all of my lies in one complete swoop.
.8. My baby cousin may come and stay with us over the Christmas holidays. He is Homer and on his own odyssey and I love him to death because he is a hustling bad-ass with a heart of gold and a mind to match. Any woman would be lucky to have him, and I know that if I were 18 again, I would force him to 2ukhtubni.
This would then allow him to sing:
“Bitloomooneee leh?”
:: ta-ra ::
.9. Considering the kind of strong and brilliant and passionate masculine men who surrounded me throughout my childhood, and in fact, my entire life, it is absolutely no surprise that I am drawn to this same sort of man on this day.
Unfortunately, one too many a man usually blur these lines with hyper machismo, which stopped being attractive when Gerardo quit singing Rico Suave in order to put on a shirt and raise his children.
More on this later, perhaps.
Oh! And let’s not forget that boys will lie. Men won’t, but boys will always lie.
.10. And on that note, I have been trying to flesh out what it is about a man that attracts this particular female and I must say it is quite simple.
“Can I have that really big cup of coffee of yours?”
:: insert hand motion to denote wide, rather than large object ::
“The really, really huge cup of coffee?”
The woman behind the counter looked discombobulated and so I offered: “Do you mean the extra large?”
To which the crazy woman hollered “YES!”
Note to you: Imagine her on a game show.
Perhaps she was merely having an off day. I did that once at the A & W counter when I requested “portable ketchup”. Am certain everyone around me thought I a loon.
Note to self: Imagine am on a game show. One that is televised in Cairo and is Tamer Hagras’ favourite game show. Perhaps Tic Tac Cairo, or Cairo Squares, Wheel of Cairo, Cairody, or even The Cairo is Right.
Note to self 2: Have found 14th calling; Go to Cairo, start game show and make millions of dollars. Marry Tamer Hagras.
Note to self 3: Oh. My god. What if Tamer Hagras is already married? (More on this later, maybe. Must do investigative work first.)
.2. I have the first signatory of the "Tamer Hagras Should 2ukhtub (me)" petition which I alone am spearheading: Sami Al-Husseini.
In one of his comments, Sami wrote: "Please Tammer come to Ottawa and propose!!!!"
We shall forgive Sami’s misspelling of Tamer’s name, and am certain Tamer and Sami will like one another once they meet at the wedding.
Also, and although a variation of “2ukhtub”, “propose” functions in the same capacity and one that is binding nonetheless.
.3. Do friendships have expiration dates? What of acquaintanceships? Is there a time limit one can impose on those in front of them before they can chuck them? Deny them? Ignore them? And what of respect and courtesy and being adult and all things nice that we were raised to revere?
.4. Still have not purchased either props nor food for Saturday evening, am running out of time and am seriously lacking any proper hostess-ing skills at the mo.
.5. Spoke with R once again this morning and he was happier than last we spoke. He was on his way to visit Ahmad in Vermont and get him out of jail (they were able to pool together the bail money), where our girls and boys in the immigration offices thought it appropriate to place a terrified refugee seeking shelter.
It made me smile to hear a slight relief in his voice, although Ahmad will still be deported back to the 56 year old refugee camp in Lebanon. Allah yi7meehum and inshallah all of this work being done by the likes of R will pay off if not today, then in the future. Their work is both inspiring and inspired.
.6. As of this morning, I received the mailing addresses of 7 individuals whom I don’t know and who want Holiday greeting cards due to what I blogged a few days back.
.7. I have discovered that boys lie. Men don’t, but boys will always lie. I on the other hand, am an absolutely terrible liar as I become completely anxious, jumbled and convinced that Allah will crush me by unravelling all of my lies in one complete swoop.
.8. My baby cousin may come and stay with us over the Christmas holidays. He is Homer and on his own odyssey and I love him to death because he is a hustling bad-ass with a heart of gold and a mind to match. Any woman would be lucky to have him, and I know that if I were 18 again, I would force him to 2ukhtubni.
This would then allow him to sing:
“Bitloomooneee leh?”
:: ta-ra ::
.9. Considering the kind of strong and brilliant and passionate masculine men who surrounded me throughout my childhood, and in fact, my entire life, it is absolutely no surprise that I am drawn to this same sort of man on this day.
Unfortunately, one too many a man usually blur these lines with hyper machismo, which stopped being attractive when Gerardo quit singing Rico Suave in order to put on a shirt and raise his children.
More on this later, perhaps.
Oh! And let’s not forget that boys will lie. Men won’t, but boys will always lie.
.10. And on that note, I have been trying to flesh out what it is about a man that attracts this particular female and I must say it is quite simple.
Labels: Dork
posted by just a girl at 6:36 PM
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