Mumisms

I’ve noted a few interesting phrases and words used by my mother. Feel free to adopt them at your peril. For fun, throw them into random conversations and then see if anyone else manages to pick up on the subtlety of the absurd.

.1. Mum’s coworker has a baby girl who my mother adores. She’s always talking about her and telling me how sweet she was. One day, she sent me an email, with a photo of aforementioned baby.

My mother had written: “isn’t she durable?”, to which I responded “I don’t know. Try throwing her against a wall and see if she bounces back unscathed.”

.2. She called me at the office one day and kept repeating “…Maha, there’s something wrong with our slop!! What are we going to DO with our SLOP?” She was a little panicked and I had absolutely not a clue what she was talking about. Instead of trying to decipher this particular Mumism, I told her we’d talk about it later.

When I arrived home, she was standing outside staring at the front of our yard. There’s a slope there and the slope was askew after our workers had put down the interlock and screwed with the angle of the slope.

.3. As we’re all aware, I harbor a strange love of trip. One evening, while walking with my mother, I tripped and although I didn’t fall on to the ground, I was doubled over laughing at myself hard enough to shake. Mum had stopped and watched this unfold and so was staring at me, doubled over and shaking when she quietly whispered “I hope you’re not broken.”