rss feedDear So-and-So
Dear Taylor Kitsch,
Hi Rigglett. How are you? I am very well – more so than usual, because Ramadan is over and I may now have my morning venti americano with a lot of milk.
Also, I have been cheating on you ever since Jared Padalecki took off his shirt. I thought you should know.
Thanks for the memories,
Maha
P.S. I hope you don’t think of me as a slut for cheating on you, unless, of course, you like cheating sluts, in which case, I remain yours forever.
Dear Jared Padalecki,
Hi. How are you? I am good.
You look terribly smart in your towel and I bet you love to talk about politics and theology.
Also, thank you for being the descendant of People With Fantastic Genes. Really, seriously. Unlike yours, my Tribe is not fitted up by People With Fantastic Genes, but rather People With Alright Genes And Every Once In A While, You Know…Not Too Shabby And We Can Really Surprise You.
Also, please undress more often.
Er…! I hope you like the font color I have chosen in honor of you.
I love your body,
Maha
P.S. I am having great difficulty not calling you DEAN as I loved you very much on Gilmore Girls. Much more so than dirty Jess and definitely more so than the blonde man-child who Rori dated for much too long.
P.S. no 2 Please cut your hair, my love. Or grow it to one length. Anything but bangs..’cus bangs are for pixies. And, because your eyes are lovely and tiny, you should really watch out about water retention – it’ll show very quickly most around your eyes. (You’re welcome.)
Dear Connie Britton & Kyle Chandler,
HI! HOW ARE YOU?
O! So happy that we’re talking again!
I miss the both of you equally.
I understand you will be away until the slut Executives at whichever stupid place you work for have decided it’s time for you to return because they are completely out of touch with reality the stupid wanks that they are.
I thought I would let you know that your absence is noted and you are missed by both myself and every single one of my 9 friends who I have introduced to Friday Night Lights.
That is all (insert sad emoticon here, please),
Maha
P.S. This shade of font is called “lavender blush”. I don’t get it, either.
P.S. Coach Eric Taylor? I would trade both above mentioned children Taylor Kitsch and Jared Padalecki for you in your angry man shorts. xo
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7 Comments:
OpenID momosanla said…
Words fail me at how much I love this post!
Tue Sep 22, 08:43:00 PM
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Anonymous Melissa said…
I posted the link to your blog on my friend, Mikyln’s page since she is a huge Jared fan. I’m sure she will get a kick out of this and fully appreciate it!
Tue Sep 22, 09:30:00 PM
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Anonymous Anonymous said…
Jensen Ackles is SO MUCH HOTTER! 
This post is really funny. Got it in an email. You’re too funny!
I am Devon
Wed Sep 23, 12:38:00 AM
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Blogger Clay said…
Excellent description of your genetic lineage, Maha =]
I regret to say I have not yet started watching this show. I don’t do much TV.
Wed Sep 23, 12:49:00 AM
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Blogger Whity said…
you never fail to make me laugh ya Maha. Just started getting back into your blog and love it
Wed Sep 23, 05:21:00 AM
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Blogger Uzi said…
I need to get back into reading your blog religiously.
Thanks for the laugh!
Wed Sep 23, 08:21:00 AM
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Blogger one female canuck said…
Mo & Melissa – thank you! Happy you enjoyed
Whity & Uzi – the fck do you mean you stopped reading my blog? I shake my TWO fists at you! (please come back.)
Clay! You MUST start watching Friday Night Lights. You simply MUST! I don’t have cable; rather, I own the first three seasons of FNL. It’s just too good not to love (and it’s so good that – in my 34 years, I have only watched 5 shows (that’s how much I hate tv…and often film) >> this being one of them; that’s a tall order, my friend).
xox
Wed Sep 23, 10:27:00 PM
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Mo & Melissa – thank you! Happy you enjoyed
Whity & Uzi – the fck do you mean you stopped reading my blog? I shake my TWO fists at you! (please come back.)
Clay! You MUST start watching Friday Night Lights. You simply MUST! I don't have cable; rather, I own the first three seasons of FNL. It's just too good not to love (and it's so good that – in my 34 years, I have only watched 5 shows (that's how much I hate tv…and often film) >> this being one of them; that's a tall order, my friend).
xox