The good news is that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.
The bad news is that I discovered mama hides her large squash-like homegrown vegetables in the basement. This is not a euphemism, but rather is a fact I discovered moments ago when mama went downstairs empty-handed and came back upstairs carrying what is called a spaghetti squash, grown by her, the size of her bum.
As I type, she is showing off her back garden (again, not sexy innuendo) via web-cam to our family in Gaza. She is also wearing pistachio green sweater to “matching” lime green socks (yes, with pants; no, not any shade of green). She is as happy as a squirrel with nuts amongst her squirrel friends who have less nuts on which to feast and so is gladly sharing said nuts.
Everywhere I have looked recently, I have felt defeated, usually engaged in thoughts such as I hate people; why are they so useless?; why do they care so much that some pop singer’s small pet died / was carried away / is lost?; why aren’t they reading about Palestine?; paying attention to Darfur?; seeking out more info on the women in the Congo?; Why so mean?; Why such bullies?; Find balance outside of pill-aw-tees, you entitled useless twat, SHUT UP!
Then I look at the eccentric weirdo with whom I live and I am made better.
And I recently realized that when she is gone, she will take 95% of the love I feel in this often-times grotesque and hurtful world, and that turns me into a sad sobby creature with mascara around her nose. But in the interim, I get to appreciate her weirdness and her bizarreness and love every bit of it and for that I am grateful.
So, most especially for those of you who have had a tough Ramadan and who were trusting enough to share their experiences with me, I thank you and hope that you too have at least one person to whom you are able to turn and who is capable of swallowing you up in their innocence and kindness. If it is your mama, then get up and hug her, high five her, kiss her, tell her you love her before you wish her Eid Mubarak.
Peace and love to you all, including you asshats.
16 Comments:
OpenID momosanla said…
Well you know I identify with this entry on so many levels. Thank you for this.
Fri Sep 18, 05:40:00 PM
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Anonymous Thomas said…
This is absurd and lovely at once. It is equally sad and uplifting. Thank you Maha and a blessed Eid to you and your family.
Thomas
Fri Sep 18, 10:06:00 PM
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Blogger Clay said…
Here’s to a blessed end to Ramadan this year–you are blessed to know who is truly important to you in life, and we are blessed to know you, and to be able to read your stories of everyday wonder and be reminded of who and what really matters to us, too.
Assalamu alaikum warahmatUllahi wabarakatuh. =]
Sat Sep 19, 02:45:00 AM
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Anonymous Maria Calvo said…
Happy Eid, Maha!
Love this little story. High Five your mama for me and let her know how many of us love you and respect you and think the world of you.
Hugs,
Maria
Sat Sep 19, 01:31:00 PM
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Anonymous Tommy of The Gays said…
Merry EID you foxy little bitch
Tommy of The Gays
Sat Sep 19, 08:05:00 PM
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Anonymous lily said…
Happy Eid, Maha. I echo all of the sentiments above and will also add that you are a super fucking cool broad! -lily
Sat Sep 19, 11:11:00 PM
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Anonymous lily said…
I forgot to tell you that this post made me laugh out loud. Really like your subtle hilariousness here
-lily
Sat Sep 19, 11:12:00 PM
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Anonymous Anonymous said…
Maha – has anyone ever told you you oftentimes sound like a Brit?
“This is not sexual innuendo, but rather is a fact I discovered moments ago when mama went downstairs empty-handed and came back upstairs carrying what is called a spaghetti squash, grown by her, the size of her bum.”
Please consider this one of the greatest compliments I can give anyone since I am a wanking Brit!
Happy Eid to all, right!
Steve
Sat Sep 19, 11:29:00 PM
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Blogger yasmine said…
maha, thank you for this post, and for sharing your mother with us via your writing.
i wish i had read this post a little earlier tonight, so i could have given my ummy a big squeezy hug (and a highfive, of course.) — it was a lovely reminder. ‘innocent and kind’ describes my mother so well, too, and i truly need to work on letting her know more often and consistently how much i appreciate her and love her.
Sun Sep 20, 04:40:00 AM
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Blogger yasmine said…
PS: highfive to comments from Tommy! it’s been too long, it feels like!
Sun Sep 20, 04:41:00 AM
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Blogger one female canuck said…
Tommy! How nice to see you after so long
Yasmine – I don’t think we can ever tell them enough. I really don’t…and can’t help but pray there’s many years left to make up for the past missed time.
Steve – a few people have, yes. Thank you, I find this a really great compliment! I think the dry humor of the British is unmatched.
Thanks to everyone else for their warm comments – a special and warm salaam to you, Clay…
xxoo m
Mon Sep 21, 10:43:00 PM
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Blogger yasmine said…
Clay’s salaam made me smile =)
highfive to you, Clay, wa alaikum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu! =)
Mon Sep 21, 10:47:00 PM
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Blogger Clay said…
High fiiive!
Mon Sep 21, 11:39:00 PM
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Anonymous Anonymous said…
“Find balance outside of pill-aw-tees…” Quite possibly the funniest thing you have ever said, and believe me – the competition for that honour is STEEP to the max.
I love you, and this made me laugh and cry – like most of your brilliant writing does.
xo
Baby J.
Clay & Yas – I love your interaction here
JANEY – more tears. BOO. I'm sorry and happy this hit a chord with you, Golden. (xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo) Also, I love that you found that funny – love making you laugh!!
m