The Hedonism

That’s Yohan, about whom I have written previously. I haven’t broken fast with anyone but family until tonight with him. This is how important he and his family (who are not with him) are to me.

He is someone with whom I can do deep-dive conversations effortlessly, alhamduliLah. One of the things we discussed was gratitude in this dunya, how absolutely and incredibly blessed we are in this place. We touched on the idea of happiness and since saying our goodbyes, I have been thinking about this as it tied into the lectures to which I listened earlier in the day.

My tears are always close to surface. Like when volunteering at Shepherds of Good Hope, without fail, there will be quiet tears in some corner of that kitchen. I’m not sure why, but it’s just a small squeezing of my chest and out come the tears. I have never once left that building feeling bad about what we had done. In fact, I have been trying all day and evening to identify what makes me happier than helping people. I couldn’t name anything. Literally, nothing has ever filled my heart the way my heart is filled after I have been able to help another.

I bring this up because ringing through my ears all day has been the following succinct line from Hamza Yusuf: “Real hedonism is the pleasure derived from serving others.” (Source: How to Find Happiness – Sonny Bill Williams & Shaykh Hamza Yusuf, YouTube.)

My God, if that hasn’t been the truest thing I have heard all week.

Today, I am grateful for:
1. The trust and friendship of those whom Allah has brought and kept in my life. Among whom are Yohan, and Cyan.
2. My big toes, for keeping me balanced; you are very nicely designed.
3. Flowers, for adding beauty everywhere you go.

Ottawa | May 13, 2019

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