The Anchors

That’s us at Eid prayer. Two out of three don’t know where to look. Someone needs to give a course.

Nearly ten years ago, I spent the Fall long weekend with Aalya, Dietrich, and the babe (now plural) at their gorgeous lakeside cabin. A part of that tradition was bringing the best cake in the world, across the history of ever, in both heaven and earth – chocolate McCain Deep ‘n Delicious. Pure chemicals never tasted so good. Pure chemicals that you must eat while frozen, else you will begin to taste them the second they are at room temperature for more than 7 minutes. FACT. Another fact? When people tell you that only cockroaches will be left in a nuclear fallout, you tell them This is correct, and they will be sitting atop a McCain Deep ‘n Delicious cake.

That tradition held for some years. Until Aalya and Dietrich consciously uncoupled.

As an only child without a traditional nuclear family of my own, traditions provide the illusion of anchors. Anchors to people over time. They make me feel endless, because always, they’re happening next year. (What I do alone, I consider rituals, not traditions.)

No children. No siblings. And one day far far far away, ya Allah, no parents. I will be adrift and in need of all of the traditions this world has to offer.

Today hopefully saw the beginning of a new tradition – Eid with family Mariam and Rana. Mariam invited me to join her, the babies, and her momma at the Indonesian Embassy for Eid prayers. Rana and her mom were going to join me and momma for food, so I invited them to prayers, and Mariam to lunch. Three women, three mommas, and two babies. Not only was it entirely too much fun (we couldn’t understand any part of the khutba, because it was in Indonesian), it felt like an anchor drop, inshAllah. A really critical one.

Many Eid blessings to you and yours, dear readers, Muslim and non-alike. May your days be full of love and kindness, and when neither show themselves, may your anchors hold you still.

Today, I am grateful for:
1. Tashii’s baby girls. Rana noticed them first and drew my attention to them because they are so beautiful. I recognized them from Instagram, which is how their momma Tashii and I connected, though never met face-to-face. Meeting her today, and giving Maya – who makes me so so so happy every time I see her face on Instagram – a hug, set the tone for the rest of this amazing day.
2. A & Rumi. Momma and son whom I met today in the lobby of my building, and with whom there was an instant connection. I love it when this happens with women; you just know that you’ve met a sister. I’m excited to get to know this woman who named her baby boy ‘Rumi’, no doubt she is one of a kind.
3. All of the Eid sweets. You are such a welcome annual treat.

Ottawa | June 4, 2019


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