The 800 Square Feet Of Love

My friends seem to think so.

Y’all know about The February Sitch and that momma has been living with me since. They have yet to begin work on her home and so she will remain with me for a couple of more months, almost certainly.

The Cloud Cave has really stepped up its 800 square feet. “Thanks God!”

Tonight, my Ramrooma and our Amoora come to Ottawa for the next two weeks. It is with them that I stayed while in the UAE, in their 250 square foot hobble (WHICH I LOVED SO MUCH BECAUSE IT LOOKED LIKE A PINTEREST HOME).

I am going to assign 200 square feet to each human. Should they step outside of their assigned area, I will kick them in the stomach. Even my mother, because she can handle it. She’s tough like that.

Too bad if they need to go to the washroom, if it’s not within their 200 square feet.

Omar is getting the balcony. At least he can pee off the side.

By the way! I will give my bedroom to Ramroom and Omar, and I will be getting super cozy in my mother’s room. With my mother, in case I’m not being clear enough. I would take a photo to show you, but if I lift my arm in such a tight space, I risk getting it stuck and then stopping circulation, and then needing amputation, and then going through physio, while dealing with the emotional trauma of my ‘ghost arm’, and then getting comfortable with my prosthetic. And I don’t have this kind of time right now. Because fcking French.

In the famous words of Google translate, I am so excite.

Today, I am grateful for:
1. Having a sense of humour. Else, I would have long ago launched myself from my balcony.
2. Omar and Ramrooma. I CAN’T WAIT TO COLLECT THEM FROM THE AIRPORT!!!!!!!!!!
3. The second review of rose-water syrup, courtesy of The Muslim Vibe. Thank you, fam.

Ottawa | Day 297 | September 23, 2019

Comments closed.