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Category Archives: Friendship

Recipe for BFFship

Last post, I promised to write something less toxic, so this is it – I have been thinking about both the personal characteristics and the characteristics of friendship itself, required to…

On Mean-Girls

Preamble: I am using the feminine only for ease of writing. Do not misunderstand this to mean that men cannot be mean-girls. Being a little shit is not specific to…

The Stand-Up Guy Part 2

For those who have lived here long enough, you remember him from the original post of 2008, because – oddly – I receive references about ‘the stand-up guy’ regularly from…

Friends, only present to share in our misery

What is that saying about knowing who our friends are in bad times? I’m not so sure about that, anymore. Or, at least, I believe there is a footnote to…


I use you; you use me?

  (I’ve said this before, but I will remind you: don’t ever engage a writer unless you’re ready to become their subject matter.) PSA: You don’t get to use people…

Dispatch #2: Jills

Readers, I would like for you to please meet Jills, this photo of her and I taken at one of my favourite London dining rooms, The Anchor & Hope (found…

Taylor Kitsch may sink my battleship, but…

Editorial Note: Originally published on 2012/02/17. ——————– Colin receives all of the accolades. Last week, I was on course for work. When introducing ourselves, we were asked to name our…

Know-It-All: My friend, the architect of her own demise

Dear Ms Know it all, I have a very dear girlfriend of 13 years. She is my soul sister and I adore her. Unfortunately, for the past three years, she…

Rejuvinated California…

Greetings from California! I had hoped to engage limited internet activity, but turns out that’s impossible for your WebMistress, and so here I am seated with a cappuccino and my…

Renewable resources or something like it

depletion noun [mass noun] reduction in the number or quantity of something. First, let me start with what happens to me physically. Yesterday, I started feeling that the left side…

Ponytails, parks, awkward communication, and The Viking

Since moving into The Cloud Cave, I hear neither the sound of wind through trees nor birds calling to one another, beauty by which I was surrounded both at my…

You will get yours sooner or later. Trust.

Once upon a time, there was a group of friends. Amidst these individuals was a girl whom we shall call “Maha.” On a sunny Saturday morning, Maha left for a…

Supporting friends: When is it time to say “no”?

I hold myself to an extreme standard of behaviour, and although I do my best to soften this where others are concerned (because who in the sh/t am I to…

Delete

Sometimes, I would really like to say: “I un-friended you because your ego-driven behaviour is so very unfriendly. I un-friended you because 9 out of 10 times, I believe you’re…

Death

It’s the only guaranteed fact of life. I have just learned that a woman with whom I went to high school has passed away due to cancer. We were acquaintances,…

Are you a belly-up turtle?

Due to certain circumstance, I have – in the last perhaps month – been having bouts of complete and total rage. Wicked anger the likes of which I have never…

Hannah’s heart

I’ve always believed that the reason Paradise is at the feet of mothers is because when they are gone, they take with them 99% of the love felt by their…

“Death’s in the good-bye”

Headed for the Great Adventure is one of the warmest, gentlest and kindest women to ever let me into her home. She is responsible for bringing together myself and her…

Part 2: Perfect mornings are drenched in rain

It was the first morning that Dianna and I awoke in Scotland. Since we were to travel overnight, we’d not made any plans for that first day, instead getting to…

Perfect mornings are drenched in rain

Several years back, Alisa & Ryan were married at Lake Placid. Baby Jane and I stayed at the Trail Head’s Inn in the Bigelow Room, then owned and run by a young couple…

Fathers

I was at a stop light watching a child who couldn’t have been older than four years old. She was holding on to her father’s hand and hanging, legs and…

On Being A Mean Girl

 I have been working on developing my World View (WV) and doing my best to make it coherent both in my head and to those I love, and naturally, to…

When friends hold our hearts

Recently, Dee (a reader) was generous enough to share her experience with me, asking how I know. How do I know when someone will be a good friend? How do I know to…

Perspective is (almost) everything

As hard as I tried, I never saw beyond the squiggles of an austereogram and for a while was convinced — like a die-hard conspiracy theorist — that no one…

Interracial Lesbian Wedding and OFC News

I can’t even begin to describe how completely stoked I am to be invited to my first QUEER wedding.  On top of which, it is interracial. I mean, do you…

A Janeism

“So I ate a fish eye. I have been out of the dating loop for so long that I thought doing that might get his attention. It didn’t work.” Comments…

Maxi & S

As just mentioned in the entry before this, S is a writer, and Maxi is a director. To refresh your memory, stories about Maxi may be found here and also…

NYC: Of Cupcakes and Kebabs

Ali and I just met. Technically, I stalked his exquisite photographic skills while still on the Face, when he tagged my girl Yasminah. Flipping through his photos gives the impression…

A Pint Sized NYC

Exceptional first night in NYC; evening started out with an in-depth literature and film discussion with Laurie. (Who is, quite possibly, one of the prettiest women on whom I have…

From Paris, with (much) Love

Dear Readers, I frequent too many a café while traveling. Once more, I write to you from a coffee shop, only this time I am in Paris on a street…

An Open Letter to BB

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Stupidity is missing your stop on an express bus with huge distances between stops.” On Blackberry Messenger two nights back I received…

A Character Clown Named ‘Namaste’

Note: Thanks to you all for the emails. Sorry I have not written back – I haven’t had much energy. I have been in a funk of late and have…

The Road to Chimayo (by Max McGuire)

The following is a 10:31 demo of an hour long documentary that is being edited. It follows Max (known at ofc (dot) com as ‘Maxi’) on a pilgrimage to El…

God fathers amputating flowers in a heatwave

.1. A few weeks back, D told me that my m.o. is to cut. Her exact words were “You’re a cutter. You amputate. Someone fucks around, they’re gone and you’re…

Friendships taken for…not enough

We talk about it regularly, with relationships, but not enough in terms of friendships. Unusual this, as more often than not, relationships tend to be fleeting whereas one hopes that…

Red Light Hooker

  That’s the mac light which Baby Jane brought as a gift for my Treehouse. It now sits in my bedroom window and I have decided that I shall use…

The Shut-Off Valve

I just sent my friend Yusuf the following bit of advice: Just remember that making a new potential partner pay for someone else’s asshatery hurts both you and the new one. …

Chin Upside the Tree!

Maxwell and I met at S’s wedding two years back. He was fun and funny and gave good wedding acquaintance-ship. Fast forward to January 2010, when Max and I stepped…