For Chai Latte Diaries and Elle Beaver advice columns – please be advised that I have neither admin nor edit rights to either their FB pages or their websites. Additionally, I do not ever choose which Qs either team will send my way; rather, the editors will sort through the Qs received, decide which will go live, and then send that Q to me.
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Things get a little rough over at Chai Latte Diaries, and my advice was missing only one thing – that this young woman seek professional help for her compulsion if, after reading this, she remains incapable of letting go: “4) Recognize that your former hostage is not a Unicorn who can sing and dance and give really amazing advice. He’s just a dude, who’s likely really gassy at this very moment, so take him off of the RIDICULOUS pedestal on which you have placed him.
5) Live by this rule: Just like there is no coercion in faith matters, Sweet Girl, so too can there NEVER EVER EVER be coercion in matters of the heart.”
Pearls of wisdom that I bet none of her friends shared with her! Now, can I have some ice cream?
This is brutal. As a man I can’t imagine having to go through something like this.
This girl can NOT contact him ever again. Leave him alone even if you see him in the street pretend that you don’t.
Get help also like Maha says if you can’t let go.
Great advice. And, may I also add – I find it interesting she mentions the loss of her parent. (having been there) In all my reading/therapy/work, I come across time and again – what is manifesting now is the original wound. Heal that wound, and it heals forward and back. A great read is Radical Forgiveness.
I like how, even though the advice you gave was necessarily harsh, you still gave it in a compassionate way. I hope it helps!
what is making dua?
What I meant was that most of us shy away from using brutal honesty with our friends when they come to us in distress. Thank God for Maha!