The Gems

Raise girls who are deeply curious and very difficult to shame. Mark them with Warsan Shire’s: “I belong deeply to myself.”

Our Prophet (sAws) made it clear during his last sermon – he cautioned men to safeguard women, without asking the same of women. Because he understood where the threat lies.

We’ve been talking a lot lately about the energy flow between women. The safe-keeping and sacredness of our relationships.

The women in my life form a Coven, and we bristle when any woman says any variation of “I’ve just always gotten along better with men.”

No you haven’t. You just see women as competition, and somehow think you’re special. Both of these things are  on you, sis; it ain’t on the sisterhood. Work on your self-esteem and you’ll suddenly start loving women. Promise.

Men are extraordinary and wonderful creatures. I absolutely adore them. Among them, are truly noble ones; and even those lacking, they are deserving of redemption and forgiveness** when they decide to course-correct. Like all of us.

**Sidebar: With a reminder that when you harm others, forgiveness by Allah hinges upon the forgiveness of the individual(s) harmed. This is the only time in Islam where Allah quiets His powers. The very essence of this concept – Justice, not merely justice – is what ultimately landed me on this deen when I went looking in my early twenties.

When men are good, they are extraordinary.

But even they still fall short of what women bring forward. A hill I will absolutely die on.

My dreams of late have been more vivid than usual. It’s because my mind is clear, and free of anything that might cloud my third eye.

Some of the women closest to me have been experiencing the same thing. We’re waking up to discover that we’re sharing dreams. I’ve pulled out all of my gemstones and crystals and am keeping them by my bed.

In Islam, gemstones and crystals are believed to carry special properties.

When worn on the hands, it’s considered sunnah (the way of our Prophet, peace and blessings upon him). He wore a ring of agate, and in the mystical sciences of Islam, it’s believed to help “calm the temper, protect against difficulties, helps lessen sorrow, bring luck when travelling and strengthens concentration among other qualities.” (Marifat al Jawahir, Syedi Ibrahim Saify)

One of my favourite contemporary examples of this is Malcolm, ra7matu-lLaah 3alayhi, who always wore a ring –

Sidebar 2: May Allah elevate me enough that I might one day have as partner a man with the courage, strength, clarity of vision, purity of heart, and commitment to justice as El-Hajj.

I have an agate stone which, when I have struggled with anxiety and pain, I’ve slept with it firmly held in my palm. I’ve not needed to do this for years and pray I won’t ever again. But if Allah sees differently, I will accept His path with as much patience as I am able. Always, I am exactly where I am meant to be, and I am grateful.

Turquoise is another that I keep close; protection against misdeeds worn when I feel I have veered from Al-siraat Al-mustaqeem. Rose quartz to draw love, and black onyx for protection. The latter two, I never take off.

Each woman in my life, they are a gem. There is kheir in each one; to this, Allah has seen.

With the of my People, I had been completely disregulated. AlhamduliLaah this has not been the case for some time now. I’m not entirely certain of all the reasons which helped me get here, but I know that one of them is rooted in the Coven of which I am a part.

Apart from a laser-focus at work, I continue to protect my energy ferociously and I only (still) saw a very very select few.

All women.

Three men, as honourary. While they’re not welcome at our Table, they are sometimes permitted to share tea with us. More on them some other day.

May you continue to belong first and foremost very deeply to yourself. May you hold, and be held by others in direct proportion to the softness you bring into dunya. May Allah increase you in softness towards yourselves first, so that you might extend it to others, if you struggle to find it.


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