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Maha Mondays: Online chatting monogamy & public speaking

At Chai Latte Diaries, Bro A spends a couple of minutes having a conversation with a woman online on a dating site. The same woman who his Bro B thinks…

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We all have one; what’s yours?

Indulgence, that is; flowers are mine. I buy flowers every week and when I have someone over who asks what they should bring, I say flowers. Always, it is flowers….

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Friends, only present to share in our misery

What is that saying about knowing who our friends are in bad times? I’m not so sure about that, anymore. Or, at least, I believe there is a footnote to…

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Maha Mondays: More iron than velvet, this week

For Chai Latte Diaries and Elle Beaver advice columns – please be advised that I have neither admin nor edit rights to either their FB pages or their websites. Additionally,…

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10 year anniversary & Min Fami

Today is this home’s 10 year anniversary. Yeah, it’s as unbelievable to me as it is to you, my seven readers. Last night, I participated in my first ever panel…

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I use you; you use me?

  (I’ve said this before, but I will remind you: don’t ever engage a writer unless you’re ready to become their subject matter.) PSA: You don’t get to use people…

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Maha Mondays: Virgins, divorcees, secrets & abuse

At Chai Latte Diaries, we’re discussing the secrets we might keep from our lovers: “Sometimes, while our intentions are good (to tell the truth), and while they should not illicit…

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#31FunnyStati – The Challenge

1/31: I’ve already completed a 6 week everyday hot yoga challenge as well as a photo a day for 365 days and this morning, I was trying to come up…

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Maha Mondays: ‘Just do it’, the most painful advice possible

No Elle Beaver this week, and the most painful advice I can give someone about unwanted attention, found over at Chai Latte Diaries: “… then you need to alter how…

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Shoulder check? Check.

Two things, one of which is: Feeling secure. But first. I volunteered to go into Beirut during the summer Israel was bombing the sh*t out of the country; I went…

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Why I am not writing as often

Thank you for all of your messages – I am very sorry that I’ve not been doing much writing but only for Maha Mondays at both Elle Beaver and Chai…

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Maha Mondays: Avoiding those you’ve bedded & initiating a virtual engagement

Elle Beaver: “Do not text. Texting in such scenarios is for the kindergarten-heads. Call her, tell her you wish to see her to talk about why you have been avoiding…

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On the audacity of having an opinion

I was recently reminded that once upon an ex friendship, a few girlfriends and me were told that we have opinions. Stop laughing. When stated, this person’s voice was clearly…

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Maha Mondays: Your Piece’s Bully of a BFF & The Fella Who Wants to Commit (but is stuck in a tree of his own making)

Elle Beaver’s reader is challenged by a dismissive limp-dick boyfriend and his BFF: “…those whose uplifting is sourced from their active debasement of others are the most miserable and insecure…

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‘Maha Mondays’: Wedding jitters & friendly texting?

The two new advice columns are live (and every Monday, I will link to them from here). Elle Beaver: I’m getting married and I’m all jittery. What’s up with me?…

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‘Maha Mondays’ is live

Find the first column at Elle Beaver, in response to: How Do I Satisfy My Personal and Physical Needs (Quickly)? A snippet: In this same ‘being an adult’ vein, switch up your logic….

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Elle Beaver – I am your new favourite Consigliere

Does ”Consigliere” have a gender? Either way, I have better hair than Tom Hagen. So, over here on this Elle Beaver intro page you’ll find the details about my new gig. They…

Intuition

On Intuition: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

“The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.” -Albert…

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Know-It-All: How can I be happier, considering my history?

Dear Maha, I am not clinically depressed or unhappy, its just that I feel like my “normal” happy baseline is lower than others. I don’t feel joy or excitement the…

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Imagine if we were swans?

Editorial Note: Originally published on 2012/04/06. ——————– We’d croak when our partner died. No fun. Two days ago, I was discussing soul mates with my friend. Whether we believed there…

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December’s (not so gentle) lessons

December has proven an interesting and challenging month. From it, I am blessed to carry into the new year three life lessons. First. Trust only my gut instinct. Nothing, absolutely…

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Wedding RINGS have dislodged me

Editorial Note #1:This article was originally published 11/11/02. I am currently on holiday and unless titled Dispatches, then what you are reading was scheduled for publication in advance of my…

Terrified Woman Screaming

Courting stories from the pits of Arabic male dementia

Editorial Note #1: This article was originally published 11/11/04. I am currently on holiday and unless titled Dispatches, then what you are reading was scheduled for publication in advance of…

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Dispatch #2: Jills

Readers, I would like for you to please meet Jills, this photo of her and I taken at one of my favourite London dining rooms, The Anchor & Hope (found…

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Dispatch #1: London traditions

I started writing this while sat atop Primrose Hill watching the sun come up over the City. For those of you who have from time to time visited and had…

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Mark, my imaginary friend

Editorial Note #1: This article was originally published in 2011. I am currently on holiday and unless titled Dispatches, then what you are reading was scheduled for publication in advance…

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Allah does not discriminate (a.k.a. “On Bein’ Single”)

Editorial Note: Originally published on 2012/11/19. ——————– “Since masculinity is defined through separation while femininity is defined through attachment, male gender identity is threatened by intimacy while female gender identity…

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Taylor Kitsch may sink my battleship, but…

Editorial Note: Originally published on 2012/02/17. ——————– Colin receives all of the accolades. Last week, I was on course for work. When introducing ourselves, we were asked to name our…

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Know-It-All: I love emotionally unavailable men (but don’t know it)

Dear Know-It-All, I feel as though I am stuck in a rut and can’t get passed it. Every guy I like turns out to have commitment issues or isn’t into…

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Egos & Immediate Self-Gratification

Like. Like. Like. How many Likes? Let me quantify myself by your Likes. My ego hates Freud Over coffee with Trouble (welcome home, Mr G), my friend and I conversed…

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I will survive

Out for ice-cream the other night, a friend turned to me and asked in very serious tones: What do you carry with you in case of emergency? I, equally serious…

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Gentlewoman’s Rules (aka How Not to be a Cad – Female Styles)

.2.   Trust him. Unless he’s treated you in untrustworthy fashion, trust him. .3.   If you don’t like something, then tell him. Don’t expect him to figure it out on his…

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31 Ways on How Not To Be A Cad (for David F.)

.1. Respect her. (Respect yourself.) .2. Don’t just text her. Start calling instead. Conversation is a lost art form; revive it. (Text only when others are around and you want…

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Know-It-All: Liar, liar, pants on fire

“Dear Maha, Thank you for your amazing site. My friends have been reading you for years and then we talk about your articles afterwards. I was in a really shitty…

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Lesson #1: Don’t stand next to their pile of sh/t unless…

Since a little girl, I have never been capable of looking at a situation and not trying to undo it, in order that I might understand its machinations. Unlike those…